So my wife and I finally made the big move this weekend into our new house.

When we started researching the place, what we knew was that it was between 2 catholic schools, the landlord was an over-sharer who was a better artist than landlord, and that it was inhabited by 4 guys in their 30’s. All that being taken into account we figured it would be a mean feat to clean the place up. Upon inspection, we found that the four guys in their twenties were living out high school fantasies and that the place was left in complete discord by four adult men. The whole place was torn up to really intelligently split one cable signal 5 different ways, the stove was 12 years unused (seriously), and the porch is a death trap.

But here’s the piece de resistance, we were lead to believe they were growing a little weed in the basement. Personal convictions aside, that’s fine. I’d always rather people learn to grow their own then give their money to someone who is probably taking part in a wider drug ring that also distributes more destructive substances. However, what we found out was that they were running a full operation, AND LEFT IT BEHIND.

Now we are relegated to hauling out growing lights, co2 tanks, and to un-blacking blacked-out windows. The doors all have a ridiculous amount of extra locks on them, placed in such a way that they make the door fortified against forced entry. It looks awful and is ridiculous.

The thing that really gets my goat is that there were a billion PHISH cassettes that we had to haul out (Lord help my rage) and Bob Marley posters EVERYWHERE.

ATTN Idiots of the World: Bob Marley encouraged marijuana use as a form of protest against white colonialism and used it in religious ceremonies. You are white and irreligious…and an idiot. The most vocal Rastaman in Jamaica (poet Mutabaruka) doesn’t even smoke!

P.S.

PHISH SUCKS! You’re too lazy to seek out dynamic music with a real and poigniant message so you settle for background noise made FOR THE SAKE OF ITSELF!

Luckily we have awesome friends and family who are helping us clean the place up. I still think it was the best pick of our options, all thing being considered. We should have looke more closely before moving day, and maybe made a few more demands of the rentee, but such is life.